Review: Matrescence by Lucy Jones
In a world where motherhood is often romanticized or depicted in one-dimensional terms, prioritizing the expected needs of the child, Jones provides with Matrescence an honest exploration of the profound transformation that occurs when a woman becomes a mother. This life event often comes as a shock and a painful experience, despite the many joys that brings a child into a family, accompanied by a loss of self and self-sacrifice; in this book, Jones aimed to ‘untangle these punishing feelings’. She beautifully articulates how matrescence—the birth of a mother—is a journey as significant as the birth of a child, and one that deserves more attention and understanding.
“I also wanted a birth that I could control in some way. So I was attracted to the idea of a ‘natural birth’ without pain relief. Looking back, now, I realize how potent the ideology is, and how it intersects powerfully with broader ideas about how women should be and behave, and what they should tolerate. ”
Photo Stuart Simpson / Penguin
For anyone preparing for parenthood, Matrescence is the book we wish we had read to prepare for the emotional, physical, and mental challenges that lie ahead. Jones writes about topics that are often considered taboo or glossed over in societal narratives, such as maternal anger, loss of independence, and the overwhelming nature of caregiving. Her writing brings comfort and perspective, making the reader feel less isolated during the difficult moments. She writes in depth about the biological and cultural changes that happen - for good and bad- to women after giving birth, and to any parents caring for children. By describing the shared experience of motherhood in all its complexity, Jones helps mothers feel seen, heard, and understood on some extremely intimate and potentially triggering topics.
Jones also challenges the societal conditioning and unrealistic expectations placed on mothers in Western culture, in a world where they are increasingly isolated and their labor is often disrespected. She deconstructs and analyzes ideas around breastfeeding to medically assisted births with honesty, vulnerability, and intellectual rigor.
Her writing doesn’t shy away from the difficult realities of motherhood, and she provides a wealth of data points to underscore the systemic challenges that mothers face. Jones illustrates how the systems around us from public spaces to healthcare—are often not designed with mothers in mind, and she offers concrete ideas for how we can reshape our environments to better support new parents.
Jones provides a wealth of data points to underscore the systemic challenges that mothers face. She illustrates how the systems around us—from public spaces to healthcare—are often not designed with mothers in mind, and she offers concrete ideas for how we can reshape our environments to better support new parents. The book is also a treasure trove of references, literature, and research on early motherhood. It blends research, personal essay, and creative writing to explore the symbolic connections between birth and nature. Jones’s prose is original and thought-provoking, making the reader think deeply and holistically about how the experience of giving birth relates to broader ecological and cultural themes. Those curious to dive deeper into the topics discussed will find this book a valuable starting point for continued learning. A regret, perhaps, is that there were opportunities to further deepen how her context (the UK) shaped that experience. Our queer members also regretted that so little of the research on their experiences was included, though no book can cover all that is motherhood today.
Overall, Matrescence is a must-read for anyone approaching parenthood, whether mothers themselves or partners who want to better understand the journey ahead. It offers a realistic, compassionate portrayal of motherhood, balancing honesty with empathy, and serves as a foundation for rethinking how we can better support mothers in modern society. Jones’s work inspires not only reflection but action, inviting us to imagine a world where mothers can navigate this life-changing transition with greater support and understanding.
